Repost day. Always good to have a look in the larder and see what needs a bit of exposure. Today: mysterious signatures on a castle wall…
Long ago, we settled on a euphemism for the dog’s prolific urination.
He is gifted in the extreme in this area, and it is like watching a holy miracle as more and more liquid is emitted from a very small dog.
Today, for the umpty-thirteenth time, I heard someone exclaim incredulously” “But how is it possible? How can he have anything left?”
Very early on in the childrens’ young lives, we were asked, with artless candour: “Why does Macaulay do that?”
“It’s a sort of way of signing his name, Darling”, I retorted, smoothly and with a modicum of smugness.
“Macaulay walks around a landscape,” I added, really getting into my stride now, “but he also has a scape we can’t see: a smellscape. He is leaving a name on every lamp post between here and home, so other dogs will know exactly who he is.”
And ever since, across the years, I have had Princesses, offspring, the world and his little brother running up to me in excruciatingly public places and shieiking: “Mummy…Auntie Kate….Felix’s Mum….Macaulay is signing his name!”
Anywhere is fair game for the dishevelled creature. While he is well houstrained, when my sister moved into her new home we narrowly avoided him christening the fireplace: because it was his, and it was new.
Of course, it’s not just him: humans, too, choose their own way to make themselves part of their surroundings. The clifftop walk to our favourite seaside is punctuated by benches where people sit and take in the vast view across the English Channel.
Each has a small brass plate decorating its backrest. Each commemorates someone who loved this place, and who is gone now. We walk past and as we read their names, they are irrevocably linked with this place in our minds.
Signing our names: it’s a tiny kind of immortality.
In my head, over the last few days, a set of names have been repeating themselves. The names are French, and they are three hundred years old.
I found them on the castle wall the other day, and immediately rooted out a guide. Are these real, I asked?
Oh yes, was the reply. They were French officers, prisoners of war in the castle during the Wars of the Spanish Succession.
They were billeted there in an English summer in the early 1700′s and so, naturally, it was cold and misty and inhospitable.
The great hall of the castle was fitted out in oak panelling, and POWs are not likely to respect their surroundings at the cost of their comfort. So they tore down the panelling and put in in the huge fireplace that dominates the hall, and set light to it, and burnt it.
And they were warmer, and dryer. But they hadn’t quite finished making their mark.
They set to, finding the softest stone in the hall; and then they wrote their names in the stone. They drew. They even wrote poems in it, the guide enthused, although I haven’t found these yet.
There are, of course, far older signatures in history: Roman generals used them to sign detailed military documents, Egyptian pharaohs used them to confirm their obvious deity.
But a signature dear to my heart was a grudge signature. Under duress, even.
English kings before 1215 were an omnipotent lot. They could do anything they liked, however they liked, and if you didn’t approve execution was a common consequence.
But John had crippled his subjects through raised taxes, he had waged some sorry apologies for wars: and he had picked fights with the Pope.
And his Barons were getting edgy.
Good form at the time was to find an alternative potential monarch and back him to win. But the Barons had a problem.
There simply was no-one they thought suitable. Arthur of Brittany had all the obvious credentials, until he was disappeared in some very suspect circumstances. Louis of France’s claim was tenuous at best, and at any rate the Barons had been at war with the French for the previous thirty years. One doesn’t simply negotiate truces and invite one’s enemy to take one’s throne.
So, using a mite of force, the Barons forced John to put his name to a whole new way of operating. At Runnymede meadow, on June 15, 1215, he agreed to a document which limited his own power and guaranteed that no free man could be punished, except through the law of the land.
From those as base as Caliban to those with motives as pure as Ariel, everyone has a signature of some kind. The dog is the ridiculous, those prisoners of war sublime.
And somewhere in between the two lies a King’s seal which guaranteed my basic rights, eight hundred years ago.
Kate Shrewsday 
Another excellent post, Kate. Dover castle?
Indeed, Earlybird 🙂
The symbol of our democracy = dog wee. Kate, you have surpassed yourself!
I have to disagree about the motives of Caliban and Ariel, however; they were badly treated but had different abilities, and both just wanted their freedom…rather like our barons and your dog 🙂
I’ve always believed every syllable of Prospero’s propaganda about Caliban, Tilly: didn’t he mount a challenge on Miranda’s virtue? It’s what he would do with his freedom that concerns me…
For me, Propspero is an arch manipulator. It wouldn’t surprise me to learn that he provoked Caliban to it, to firm up the evidence. Daughters weren’t worth much in those days. Not that I’m excusing Caliban; it’s just that I think he’s as much a victim as Ariel, Miranda and anyone else who strays into Prospero’s realm. I don’t believe he could get off the island until he burned his book and thus mended his ways.
As for Caliban, he wouldn’t be able to do much with his freedom, trapped on the island. He would be his own man, but a prisoner just the same.
I love this repost – and as time goes by I love your (wee) dog more and more.
He is jolly entertaining, Rosemary.
Those Italian pictures of yours, by the way: simply stunning.
Ahh, nothing like starting my day with one of your hilarious lessons. If you had been my teacher in school, I’d probably be Prime Minister. This is my favourite way of teaching history – hope you van get it in the US -http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4x0K2Y7kPw
Now wouldn’t that be something, Sharon? 😀
Another delightful history lesson — from the signature of a dog to the signature of a King (rather Kevin Bacon like.) 🙂
Sharon is right…. Too bad that teachers such as you seem so few and far between. Not until you cited the date did I have a clue where this tale was ending — the cast of characters wasn’t helping me at all. This must indicate that MY history teacher (but darned if I can remember which one) had to have been much more focused on dates than people and circumstances.
The people and their motives are so much fun to follow, Karen: it becomes quite compulsive! Like a great long soap opera… there’s a rather wonderful history lesson here at Horrible Histories. Hope it’s playable in the US. It’s delicious. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4x0K2Y7kPw
Oh, it plays. Thank the heavens, it plays! (A special shout out for Henry V!)
Thanks for holding the door open to “Horrible Histories”, Kate. I’ll be wandering about the place for some time to come. I think this might even be cool enough for the little man. (Gotta sneak in history however I can.)
😀
Brett, I will furtively admit that HH is one of my favourite sketch shows: a lot of adults here watch it because it’s so funny. Check out King Charles II “The King of Partying”. I’d go if I were invited. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2kyNbZc7oc
Learning and laughing. A great combination.
When I was growing up, we had a dog who liked to ‘sign’ new house guests. They were never amused.
I can well imagine, Andra. Best to have a change of shoes and socks in the cupboard 😀
First off, I wholeheartedly approve of any piece that moves from urinated lapdogs to the Magna Carta that smoothly.
On another level, history moves in strangely similar ways. It’s odd to think that my own country exists in its current form because of, in chronological order, some loudmouthed Greek thinkers, some stubborn barons tired of a despots BS, a silver-tongued Iroquois chief, and a group of self-educated colonial farmers. It’s rather stunning just how far-reaching a signature or two can be.
Plus ca change, plus ca le meme chose, Connor 😀 John Hancock’s signature was pretty big and pretty far reaching…
I wonder what expression Prince John wore on his face, Kate, whilst completing his grudge signing., mayhap one like Macaulay wears as he’s searching for just the ‘right’ spot to um…spot against… I can just ‘see’ the Prince trying to winkle out a get-out clause. But he couldn’t and now it’s a part of Ancient History… Such a great post on ‘monickers’ past… I wish sometimes we could all leave our own ‘mark’… um. not like Macaulay, 😉 I mean like the Bench Commemorations, such a good idea methinks. xPenx
I think you’re very astute, Pen. I always have a picture of him casing the exits there by the river at Runnymede 🙂
What a delightful lead into a very significant historic event. Marvelous, Kate. A feast. Many thanks.
Glad you enjoyed it. Souldipper 🙂
If you have not seen the movie, “Never Cry Wolf,” it is one that I highly recommend for you and your whole family. Maddie and Felix will likely enjoy it and learn. You will understand why I’m embedding this clip from the movie when you watch it, but it is very appropos! The quality of this clip is VERY POOR, butr it is decipherable. Get the whole movie and enjoy the whole thing – and with a much better picture!
oooh, will do, Paula: thank you! I suppose with Macaulay’s ancestry his signature was decided for him…
Here is the link, in case the clip did not embed properly:
Macaulay’s just doing what we humans do in the Blogosphere in the Dogosphere. Perhaps it’s time he had his own blog…
It may have come to that moment. I just have to teach him to use the keyboard.
An entertaining read! Of course, I have to spoil it for myself by noting the anomaly that in the case of Macaulay a wee signature can be quite a sprawling one.
I knew you’d spot a pun in there somewhere, Col 😀 Wonderful…
Just as well humans don’t generally mark their territory in the same way as dogs, huh?!
I know a few corners of London…round the corner from some notorious pubs…which might prove you wrong Pseu 😀 Didn’t the BBC cover this on their Breakfast programme?
Wonderful post, Kate!
I hope you can see this dog peeing on two legs:
This is utterly priceless, Nancy. How in the name of…..
Ah yes, the pee signature 🙂 I wrote a poem ‘social networking for dogs’, but mine was a twitter feed – haha
‘dispensing regular pee updates
what’s happening
twitter feed for furry friends’
I do enjoy your historical musings – enjoyable learnings (my Dad is a historian and was mortified at my lack of interest in modern history while at school – but years later I did develop a love of history – mainly ancient history and now even a love of modern history – eek, he would be proud). Your post is fantastic as usual.
Thanks so much, Gabrielle. Twitter feed for dogs. Classic.
Interesting reading, Kate. I am learning so much history via Macaulay. 🙂
However I was thinking of the guide you found to tell you about the signatures on the castle walls. In India, a lot of times, the guides make up their own stories, which are fascinating in their own rights, but not always true.
But then, we have a long tradition of oral history, which does not always make us good historians.
I bet their stories are quite wonderful, though, Banno. We have a saying here: never let truth get in the way of a good story….
I had to read this twice. The first read I got distracted with the thought that you read three hundred year old names on the castle wall…I don’t see castles very often 🙂 and the second read was slow and deliberate. You cover a lot of rich historical ground! What a wonderful post! Debra
One day, Debra, you must take a plane over here and experience it for yourself. I used to take this for granted, being surrounded by castles, but I try not to these days.
Doggie signatures abound here, too. My neighbor, Duke (a sweet, bumbling boxer dog), likes to visit and “sign” with frequency, afterward rending the ground with hind paws like a bull preparing to charge. At first I feared for my shrubberies, but he never “writes” in the same place twice! You’re the best history teacher ever!
Hmm, foxes leave their signature too……
There is a copy of Magna Carta at Salisbury Cathedral. Worth a look, the display is really interesting.
I must do my Cathedral post, but we’ve been plagued with mini powercuts over the last little while, and this has severely cut my time online. Thank goodness for scheduled posts 😆
Indeed! I would never have guessed! Hope they clear up soon…