The poles.
As far apart from each other as it is possible to be: either ends of our globe. Half the arctic ice shelf melts at the arctic, but there is no such melting cycle at the antarctic; and while the North pole is cold – with minus 34 decrees celsius as an average temperature at the North Pole – the South Pole can plummet to minus 49 degrees.
Poles apart, indeed.
Yet, so very similar. White, vast, freezing expanses at the very edge of mans’ experience. The place where Frankenstein’s monster fled, and Ice Station Zebra was based seem almost identical to the ice wilderness in which Scott perished.
They are worlds apart, yet they are the same.
From the same root as ‘polar’ we get our word: polarisation. The tendency to divide into two groups at the extremes of opinion.
The idea of such extremes is acted out again and again in our folklore: and nowhere with more haunting resonance than in a fairy tale written by an Aberdeenshire minister, writer and poet named George MacDonald in the latter half of the nineteenth century.
“The Day Boy And The Night Girl” was a nightmarish experiment conducted by a witch in pursuit of complete knowledge.
She invited two expectant mothers to the castle. One was an ambassador’s wife, who was given sunlit rooms in which to give birth; the other, a blind widow, was entombed in windowless rooms beneath the castle. She disposed of the mothers.
The boy, Photogen, born in the sunlight, grew up in light and somehow, the witch managed to ensure he never saw the night. The girl, Nycteris, grew up with the light of one dim lamp.
Forever in darkness, Nycteris learnt how to give the witch the slip, and discovered the night forest and the moon. She fell in love with the enchanting world of the night. Photogen, who adored hunting, set out after a nocturnal beast and stayed out after sunset by mistake. And as darkness fell he was paralysed by terror.
They met, of course.
She comforted him; and watched over him as he slept. And in time the sun rose and she was utterly horrified by it. Photogen became immediately brave and left the forest; but he came back the next night, and the next.
Each used the other’s strengths, reconciling fear and learning courage through the eyes of their polar opposite. Thus, together, they were able to defeat the woman who had devised such a damaging experiment. And finally, they married.
In the end, Photogen loved the night because it was his love’s home; and Nycteris yearned for the day, the symbol of everything for which her beloved stood.
The author insisted this was no allegory.
Yet it has something to say about what happens when two polarised feelings are happening within us. Contradictory impulses. That concept that was named at the birth of the 20th century by a man called Eugen Bleuler: ambivalenz. What we call, ambivalence.
A sister may adore a clever, talented brother in whose shadow she stands, yet resent him too. An employee may idolise the boss whose methods infuriate him. There are a thousand applications, a thousand thousand; as many as the myriad human emotions which nestle, incongruous, next to each other beneath our conscious minds.
Because life is never that simple. It is never polarised. We keep contradictory feelings in our hearts, in some dark cellar where they cannot remind us of them. Our minds are built to tune out such dissonance, yet the mixed emotions are part and parcel of the way we are.
It is only by allowing ourselves to meet the other half of our feelings – the night-girl living in our subconscious – that we can be most truly us.
Written in response to Side View’s Weekend Theme, Ambivalence, which you can find here.
Picture source here
Kate Shrewsday 
oh Kate, you have outdone yourself. What a wonderful post
Thank you Sidey 🙂 Your doing, really: I would never have asked these questions had it not been for your theme.
the theme is a little hole in the wall, what people make of it never ceases to amaze me
A good thoughtful start to my day. As I sip my coffee I’m still trying to fathom out my dream of getting across flooded streets to get to the airport… oops.
Oh, dreams, don’t get me started on them, Roger! 😀
Sometimes a mere flick of the ‘like’ button isn’t sufficient response to a post – then other times a comment can be nothing but naff and inadequate too. What to do? Really like this Kate.
Thanks, Wanderlust. I figure this kind of post is an acquired taste, but sometimes it needs writing.
Thank goodness!
Huge huge ‘Grunt!!!’ from me and a double dog tail wag from the resident Zen Master.
A well gestured drawing of the creative being.
Thank the Zen master for her double wag, Hudson. I am honoured. Loved your latest post.
I wish our pathetic excuse for leaders would read this post.
Learning to ignore the NIght Girl is the only way some of them can carry on, I suppose, Andra. Self deception becomes a form of self defence.
But she’s still there, whether they reconcile with her or not.
A brilliant narrative of the internal struggles with which we grapple, and from which we learn
Thank you, BB!
so well written, learn to love difference, thanks again
And there you go again, Elspeth, getting right to the heart of the matter, Elspeth. You’re good at that 🙂
I am writing my response to ‘ambivalent’ now. I hope it is OK to refer to your wisdom and wit – the world does indeed need such things, which you are good at.
To which self shall I be true? One day, one step, a way is sought.
A lot of wisdom needed by us all, Lou 🙂
So apt and descriptive. “An employee may idolise the boss whose methods infuriate him” and “Our minds are built to tune out such dissonance, yet the mixed emotions are part and parcel of the way we are” particularly spoke to me, and loudly.
Probably because they have happened, and continue to happen, to me, Karen. We are contradictory souls, us human beings, but that is our brilliance 🙂
I’ve never heard of that story — it sounds beautiful — horrifying, but beautiful. Well written, Kate.
Thanks, Kathy. The story says something more than the sum of its parts, I feel 🙂
I’d like to send a copy of this to every politician in Washington.
The politicians here could do with a copy too, PT….
We have to find that other half in ourselves in order to have stable and lasting relationships, we can’t find the balance in someone else if we ourselves are not balanced already. ‘The Antarctic is a continent entirely surrounded by oceans, the Arctic is an ocean almost entirely surrounded by continents.’ 🙂
IE, I can always rely on you for a magical spin on the day’s theme. Finding the other half of ourselves: a perfect crystallisation. And I love the observation on arctic and antarctic…
Well I’m glad you don’t see it as sabotage or hallucination! I’ve always liked that description and have meant to work it into the post since forever. Have fun with your shortbread. 🙂
Bravo Kate! There is so much to find within ourselves and others if we will only take the time to look.
There is 🙂 Thank you!
I will never think of ambivalence again without a much deeper understanding! Beautifully written and so interesting, Kate. I live with a lot of ambivalence. I think I quite naturally see two sides to almost anything, and as such, I can often sound very undecided. It’s not at all that I don’t have strong opinions, but when you can see multiple views at the same time, it’s difficult to land so squarely on an absolute! I marvel at how many people are comfortable at those poles! This was a wonderful post! You’ve given new life to the word ‘ambivalence.’ Debra
I love your observation on those comfortable at these poles. It is a chilly place to be, I have no doubt.
Love it. Shall remember this post and the fairy tale every time I try to overcome my conflicting emotions 🙂
I found it during my research, Madhu, it’s new to me too. Quite a revelation, really. The author influenced all sorts of important people – CS Lewis and Tolkein and WH Auden and others…
You are on top form at the moment, Kate. One of your best.
Praise indeed from you, Tilly. Thanks 🙂
The second time this season that MacDonald’s story has come across my desk. Just a few weeks ago, my friend Kirk’s theatre troupe in Austin, Texas performed a stage version of the story:
http://do512.com/event/2012/06/06/dayboynightgirl
It’s a provocative concept, that of the opposite within.
Recently learned that Antarctica is part desert because it is dry and no rain despite ice.